A Dozen Silent Bro-Codes
These are silent bro-code standards I hold myself to and feel guys should just know. I don’t necessarily expect other guys to stay true to all of this stuff but these are rules I don’t break. With that said, I reserve the right to question a guy’s motives if he does this stuff.
Oh, number 6 is a non-negotiable!
A Dozen Silent Bro-Codes to Live By…
1: Never like a pic of your friend’s wife or girlfriend if he’s not in it and she’s by herself. Especially if she’s hot.
2: If your friend offers you a hot wing, keep your dumb fingers off the biggest wing.
3: No c–k blocking by tearing your friend down around women. Vicious, demeaning and hurtful nut busting is reserved for when guys are alone.
4: Piss a urinal away. Sit a seat away.
5: Don’t get drunk and start a fight and expect your boys to bail you out when you can’t back up your mouth. If your friend did nothing wrong and is the target of some D-bag, back your friend up.
6: IMPORTANT AND LIFE PRESERVING BRO CODE! If your friend has a daughter, minimal eye contact, no touching and and if there’s any signs of flirting, the friendship is over immediately – breaking this code could justify physical violence, depending on how bad the offense is. (This is one of the codes I expect all men to follow and “I’m sorry, I was drunk” won’t excuse that. And NO! It’s never OK, no matter how old she is.
7: Don’t bring your wife or girlfriend around your friends and then argue with her anywhere near your friends.
8: If you’re cheating on your girlfriend or wife, keep that to yourself. If the person you’re cheating on becomes a friend of mine and she’s cool AF, I’ll throw you under the bus unintentionally out of guilt, by the way I act. I’m not a great liar.
9: Dating a friends Ex…. This is one of those things that you better talk about with your friend first. Some dudes don’t care and others REALLY care. With that said, even the ones who say they don’t care, still do on some level.
10: If he’s getting fat, tell him he’s getting fat and looking like he needs to stop eating. Men can handle it. If he’s been a big guy his entire life, nothing you say is going to matter so don’t bother bringing it up.
11: Pay up on your bets! If you lose a bet and you don’t pay up, you’re out of the circle of bet trust for life.
12: Brutal honesty. Feelings don’t matter when advice or opinions are asked.